The things I want: 2009 edition
Tonight is the 1st night that us Jews light a candle, say some prayer and open up our first gift - which will most likely not be of any use to us. That's just how we do things.
So instead of guessing what I want, or thinking I want yarn and you end up at Joann's scratching your head or just give up and get me a gift card let me just tell you. DON'T DO ANY OF THAT. I guarantee you, if you don't refer to my amazon wishlist, or the list I have below I WON'T LIKE IT. Sure, I'll say thanks and I'll appreciate the shit out of it. But I'll go home and ask Dominic, "What the fuck am I supposed to do with this?" And I'll appreciate your gift so much as it sits unused in my closet, until someone's birthday comes along and I'll still appreciate it as I pass it on to them - so they can appreciate it too.
Or I'll just give it to goodwill. And appreciate that it's someplace else, not cluttering up my house.
That's the lesson for today. If you ever want to give me something, look my name up on amazon or click on the links below. Otherwise you just spent $15 on giving one of my friends a gift. But I'll appreciate it! I promise!
With that said, here are the highlights of WHAT YOU SHOULD GIVE ME for hanukkah, my 31st birthday or any old day you're feeling like you want to give me something:
-
This apple charm is the coolest thing I've ever seen. Sure, I don't wear jewelry and sure I don't want to become one of those people who love apples so they must display their love all over their house with apple drawings and apple pillows and apple jewelry, but this charm is something I really kinda want.
-I LOVE
this blanket. It seems like the kind of blanket that you curl up by the fire with, in a cabin, in the middle of the woods, near Mount Rainier. It's awesome and I want it for keeps. Get it for me!
-I'm actually trying to get rid of the books in the house. We have lots and they just sit there. If I read it once, then I'm giving it away - unless it's hardback, a cookbook, signed or the slight possibility I might actually read it again. But some books I still want. Like
this one about gardening in the NW and
this one about finding cures in your kitchen cabinets. Please get these for me!
-I enjoy my bathroom. It's big. Practically as big as our bedroom. Seriously. And yet, we have no radio in there.
That's why I want this. And yes, I'll take it in bright green.
-As far as exercising goes, I really love anything by
Shiva Rea, but I've been caught by the
Jillian Michaels bug and would happily sweat my ass off to her yelling at me.
-I hate cards with words in them, and anything that Bartells (your Walgreens) carries. But give me a
blank card with something snarky on the front, and you'll be my BFF.
-I'm on a plane at least 4 times a year. So I need to rest comfortably. So I need
this.
-I've put
this top up on my Things I Want every year for 3 years now. Still haven't gotten it. Not holding my breath.
-Okay, and if you did want to get me gift cards to anywhere, then you should get them at
Anthropologie,
Hot House Spa,
Churchmouse Yarn and Tea,
Spa Blix,
REI,
DeLaurenti,
Elliott Bay Books, the
Dandelion Botanical Company or shocker of all shockers,
AMAZON!Labels: me me me
Question of the day
Why isn't there a movie called Montage? The storyline could just be 2-hours of montages that show friends/happy times/fighting/getting back together/and of course a couple skipping in a park, laughing at some joke we'll never hear because the whole flick will have a 70s yacht rock soundtrack.
Either that or a movie that just shows all the actors and actresses that have died this year. Just don't put in any composers or screenwriters, because I never know who they are and they fuck up the rhythm.
Labels: questions
Step 1: WRITE IT DOWN STUPID
Step 1 in dealing with your money and actually understanding it and realizing it's value is kinda a crazy OCD monontous step, but it's really handy. All you have to do is keep track, starting right now, of every single penny you spend. Steal a notepad from work and write down the following:
Today's Date: December 3
The item you spent money on: Rent/Latte/Card for Mom
The category: Living expense/Everyday expense/Gift
How much it cost: $1650/$4.00 (including tip)/$3.25
Now do that every single fucking day. Seriously. Did you just give a bum a buck? Write it down. Did you lend a friend some lunch money. WRITE IT DOWN. I don't care that it's holiday season. Every month there's an excuse to spend money. So don't consider December any different than March. Just WRITE IT ALL DOWN.
When you're done writing everything down from December 3rd to January 3rd, you can move on to step 2.
When I did this, about 2 years ago, not only did it help me realize where my money goes (no where at the moment - cause personally I just don't spend a lot on actual things or lattes) but when I did spend money I was constantly reminded that I would have to write it down. Sometimes that actually stopped me from buying that thing, because writing it down meant it was affecting everything for that month. So, in theory, for now because most people can't remember where their keys are let alone to write down what they pay for - I'm just suggesting a month. Keep that stolen notepad with you wherever you go. Because if you want a retirement, if you want to have that fancy house, if you want your kids to go to college or if you simple want to go on vacation that isn't to your parents house - then for the love of every penny in the world - WRITE DOWN WHAT YOU SPEND.
Labels: money
Why aren’t you people doing anything?
I have A LOT of friends and family that complain or hope that one day their money issues will just disappear. I wish they knew there’s such an easy way to figure things out. I wish they would let me help them. I would. I wouldn’t even ask for anything. Okay, maybe if they really wanted to get me something I’d show them my amazon wishlist (the only things I ever want as gifts are things from this list, otherwise I never use your gift and you’ve just wasted $15 at Target – you all have been warned). But really I just want every one in my life to feel a lot less worried and a lot more secured.
Today, I asked my mom if she knew how much she spends a month. She told me a number and then I asked if she could break it down. The second she said she spends $100 a week on her twinkies, steaks and milk I knew something was wrong. She wasn’t really keeping track, every single day, of what she was spending. She was estimating. It’s okay. We all do it. Heck, some of us don’t even estimate. Some of us just blindly go through life spending money on shoes and cars and yogurt and just know that we have a wad of cash on the other side.
I want to shake you people! I especially want to shake the people who complain. And then I want to shake, slap and hurt the people that tell me all too often, “I really need to do this 401k/IRA/savings thing – I keep meaning to, but then I take a nap instead.”
WHAT THE FUCK?!
Dudes, you can friggin’ do this. I’m not saying you’re going to magically get rich tonight by saving and putting your money in the right accounts. But you’ll be getting there. You’ll realize you don’t need all that cash in your checking account. It’s just sitting there doing nothing for you. You’ll realize you could be getting money for doing NOTHING AT ALL. And all it takes is some man power. Those hours you spend at work fucking bored to tears? Open a friggin’ ING account instead. That night you watched something totally useless on TV? You could’ve organized your accounts so you never have to wonder where you put that information again. It takes time, but it’s so worth it.
So if you want my help, I will help you. I’m offering free (or gifted :-) services to you folks. I’m giving you my valuable friggin’ time. Why? Because I’ve heard ALL the excuses and frankly I’m sick of them. I want people to stop telling me they can’t do this or that. If they need me to do it for them just so I can stop listening to them talk about “should’ve/would’ve/could’ve” then please for the love of god, email me, call me – I will help you with this.
Labels: friends, money
The reason I love compounding.
Ever since I read Smart Woman Finish Rich, I acted on every single thing the author suggested right down to how I file shit. Today, I had to add my ING savings account to our joint Schwab account, and I noticed something kinda remarkable.
"Since you became an Orange Saver in 2008 your accounts have earned: $465.32"
For doing nothing at all, I scored over $400 in a year! That's like a trip to somewhere fun. Or yarn. Or $400 worth of apples.
And that's just in ING. I have so many accounts that I added to my life (which means more free money thanks to compounding interests), that I feel like I owe this author a big kiss.
So thanks author dude. You made money make sense.
You know what kills the mood?
Ever have one of those moments when you're giving your boyfriend a blowjob and suddenly there's your hair, all up in your face? And you swipe it away only to attract more hair.
This is what happens when you decide to grow out your hair for Locks of Love.
Thoughts while watching The Today Show...
Some people just look better "fat" "heavy" "big boned". I've seen a few people who lost weight and I think to myself, gosh you looked way better when you had that 50 pounds on you. Your face is hanging now and you just look weird dude.
Don't get me wrong. I am definitely pro-healthy, and I think I do a pretty good job at staying healthy and encouraging others to do the same. I just think some people were meant to be fat, heavy and/or big boned.
